I thought I would tell you about my Vipassana experience, witch I hope would encourage you to try it. Going threw life trying to work out what will help you and what doesn’t while on this journey can be quiet hard. Who can help and who just wants your money. Its quiet a difficult prose’s. Listening to my gut is the way forward for me and it hasn’t let me down yet those far.
I wanted to learn how to meditate, but was struggling to clear my mind, so I went to my local Buddhist temple to a few meditation classes, to see if I could learn some technics to help slow my brain down. After going to 5 or 6 classes, it started to slow down some. I had meet a lot of lovely people there yet one gentleman stood out to me the most, while I was there. So I made a big effort to talk and get to no him, a very peaceful man in nature, who had so many wonderful stories to tell. I asked him what really started momentum for him. He told me it was Vipassana Meditation. He didn’t explain any think else to me, regarding what it was or what it entailed. He just told me to watch a documentary on it on you tube. So I left the temple that night went home and watched these documentaries on Vipassana Meditation.
Doing Time Doing Vipassana
Not completely understanding what had changed for the people that had done the Vipassana Meditation on the documentaries I was intrigued. I was a bit me bemused weather I could meditate for 10 days, let alone not talk to any body for that length of time. So I started searching on the Internet to see if I could find any were in England were I could do a Ten-day course. How lucky I was an hour away from were I was living I found a center.
After reading up on the web site I came to learn it was free but you could donate to the cause of spreading Vipassana for all to learn. Then realized it was first come first surf to get onto the course. That you could sign up when date opened on web site. Next one to open was 29th of December. So I wrote my self a note to remind me of the day to sign up, also thinking its Christmas people will forget and I would get one booked up. I didn’t think much about it carried on going to the temple and slowing my brain down with classes there. Came two 29th December about 11 o’clock in the morning course full all ready. I couldn’t believe it, but I could get on to the waiting list. So I signed up on two the waiting list.
About a month later I got an email saying I had got onto the course. I was so excited.
I never thought about the course leading up to going. All I thought was buy the end of it I would be able to slow my head down and be quiet good a meditating. (Last think I expected was what happened)
So I arrived at the center were I was shown to my room then shown the center, were we would meditate. The women and men were then separated. Then they explained to us the ten-day plan. I went to bed that night thinking I will struggle with this. Next morning up bright and early we started meditating. It was a real struggle at first for me it was so uncomfortable with my legs crossed for that long, brain racing. So I got a chair witch helped me to relax more not feeling the pain of my legs been crossed. We were taught the technic of breathing and after two days my brain started to slow down, thinking less about the irrelevant stuff that was in my head. It was wonderful in my head, finally silence. The strangest feelings and thoughts were when I wasn’t Meditation, looking around at the people doing the same as me trying to work out what kind of people they were with out talking. On the third day the prose’s kicked into play truly not realizing what was going to happen. It was around 20.00 we had just listened to a video for the 3 day explaining more about what we were to achieve. We had just started to meditate again for the last session before bed. All of a sudden I got this sharp pain just bellow my shoulder, like I had just been stabbed in the back. It Came from no were. Crazy think was I had felt this pain many times before when I got angry, not as strong but in the same place. I was taught through the technic to feel the pain and observe it in my mind whilst in a meditative state. So I just did that. That evening I went to bed lying there feeling that pain struggling to get to sleep. It felt like pockets of air popping. Pop Pop pop for hours. Finally got to sleep around two o’clock. Next day I woke up feeling the pain still there. But carried on observing it whilst meditating. Buy the evening it had completely gone. Little did I realize at the time. I had a trauma attached to me from some part of my life that I hadn’t dealt with. And when I got up set I had a habit of trying to bury thinks deep inside my self not dealing with it. I realized When ever some body up set me it wasn’t them that was up setting me. They would trigger some think in this old wound (trauma) attached to my body that would cause me to get mad and lash out blaming them and not taking responsibility of my own emotions. That pain had been they’re my entire adult live. They weren’t hurting me I was hurting my self buy not dealing with that trauma of that pain. Carrying on through the tens days I got to the point of feeling my vibration were I could scan my body in my mind for other blockages of trauma in my body. It was the craziest think I went there to learn to mediate and ended up clearing a major trauma I had carried my hole live with out a councilor or physiologist insight. And I didn’t have to talk about any think that hurt me. On the 10th day we could talk to every body, how wonderful that was observing people for ten days no conversation. All you could see was the pain that they were carrying in there eyes and face. Wow some amazing kind gracious people. Selfless egos that wanted to understand them self’s how refreshing. Its been a few months since I went to do the course and the change in my self is amazing. Empathy love is growing inside of my self. I could always see the pain in others but now I have more understanding and patience to help. And haven’t got angry or lost my cool in any way. Never felt that pain again defiantly gone. Not to say I am finished dealing with thinks inside a lot more to do but that bit closer. And very determent to go deeper and clear out every part of the fear that holds be back.
Every body needs to go to a 10-day Vipassnana course truly amazing. I have decided I am going to go on a ten-day retreat every year now truly amazing. We carry pain inside our body and it is the cause of our suffering not the relationships we have with others. We are responsible for this no body else is.
When some think in another person up sets you have to remember it’s a mirror of what’s inside you.